Monday, September 15, 2008

it happens every year


where to start?

september. it never fails to arrive with no less subtlety than a hurricane. i'm minding my business all summer, slaving away at a job i can't stand, living quietly, counting down to anything i can cling to...and then all of a sudden, there is a series of jarring changes and i find myself with barely enough time to eat, sleep or process what is going on around me. i thrive off of this.

frosh week was the most strenuous yet, but perhaps one of the most rewarding. i had a really great group of kids on my team, that i really hope i can keep in touch with. also, being a veteran [to the max], i felt a certain responsibility to raise the bar for myself and to set an example for others. i busted my ass and worked hard to not only keep up the spirit, but to lend a hand wherever i could to ensure that the week went as smoothly as possible. this is especially hard to do when struggling with the complexities of 'real life', as i suggested in my last post, but i persevered despite wanting to quit about half way through.

through most of the week, i dealt with a rocky period in my relationship. it was hard going from here to halifax to toronto to frosh week with little time to regroup. we sort of lost our bearings, and it was frustrating to not be able to commit the time that i wanted to, to make things right again. still, we talked when we could and tried to remind each other of the bottom line and the things that really matter, and now, i feel like things are going better than ever. relationships take work, so some things that i've been trying to work on as of late include...

1. don't nitpick.
2. give compliments where compliments are due.
3. don't hesitate to say 'i love you'.
4. rather than always trying to think about 50 million things, give each thing their time, and take advantage of the moment.
5. when there isn't a large quantity of time, try to make it quality time.

in addition, on the wednesday of frosh week, while standing at the bus stop, covered in mud and wearing a garbage bag, i received a devestating phone call from my grandmother, who has been battling cancer. her tumour inside had ruptured and she had been hemorrhaging, and was at risk of bleeding out within a week, if it didn't clot up on it's own. i probably should've given up and gone home right there, but she insisted i stay and finish out the week and that she would call me if things got worse. thankfully, more than a week has passed and she's still alive. she's still bleeding and the outlook is not promising, although, she is not in imminent danger of hemorrhaging any more. just the same, nathan and i went home this weekend, so that i could spend some time with her and so that he could meet my family.

it was a pleasant weekend, and as a result, i finally feel like i let myself relax and little and sorted out the clutter that had been accumulating in my brain. and of course, time with my grandmother is growing increasingly more valuable, although i fear that sometimes i'm ignoring the direness of the situation. to be quite honest, my heart just can't take it...but in time, i will learn. i really have no choice.

with my attention being drawn to so many commitments and concerns, i feel as though perhaps my friendships have been neglected, however, our recent decision to form the zombie defense club through csrc/nusu has made me feel a little more optimistic [yes, i'm being completely serious. message me for details]. time here at nip is ticking, and i want to be able to spend as much quality time with my friends as possible, without abandoning my other commitments, and this provides the great opportunity for us to do something epic and ridiculous, as has always been our standard. it's also sort of nice, that this will provide an opportunity for us to spend time together NOT drinking and outside of our dingy living room's. needless to say, i'm really excited about it. keep your eyes out at club days, for our table and brochures!

i hope all is going well with you lovely readers, and that the return to school has been full of excitement, delightful new discoveries and comforting old standby's.

ps: one last thing, please remember that you can recycle all batteries either at the nusu/csrc office and the nipissing registar's office! also, if anyone is interested in taking over the battery recycling program after this year [i run it by myself right now], please let me know! i'm considering just turning it over to rez, and their think recycle program, although any input is encouraged and appreciated.

pss: today's picture is from post secret. most of you have probably at least heard of post secret, but if you haven't i defintely recommend checking it out. updates on sunday are something i look forward to all week!

4 comments:

Fraffy said...

It is so crazy to think how fast the last two weeks have been, I haven't really had time to just sit and relax yet, though hoping to this weekend :).
I definately would be interested in joining a zombie defence club and I know my girlfriend will be jumping for joy if she could too, so if you could let me know any details that would rock! :D

the name's athena said...

i'll let you guys know more when i know more :]

Casey said...

I was wondering, since your posts are always so eye opening - what drives you to persevere through the rough spots?

the name's athena said...

appreciation for the little things, strong relationships, great music and this...writing.

and i guess, above all else, a borderline naive sense of optimism.